Kids bring out the best in this world.
I have thought this from the time I was a child myself, and dreamed of what my own children would look like.
I guess that’s the thing. I have many children, but they’re only mine for a short time. Whether they are students or the ones with wings, I try my best.
Tonight is the Worldwide Candle Lighting for families everywhere who have lost a child. I can think of nothing better than lighting a candle in our homes while we are separated due to COVID-19 to honor these children and their families.
During this time, there are many messages of thanks I wish to share, so they will have to be one at a time in the coming days. Too often, it might be easy to move on with life for some after a funeral. There is never a “moving on” after you lose a child because part of you flies away forever with your angel.
But there is moving forward with the child in your heart.
John, Hayes, and I are fortunate to have people surrounding us who understand our journey continues. We are so thankful for the love shown in honor of Corrie’s first birthday in heaven. Of course, most of us love to eat cake.
The wonderful eighth grade teachers at my middle school surprised me with gifts to use on the Kinder Memorial Walk. If you’re unfamiliar with it, this is where I weedeat, clean, and decorate babies’ and children’s graves that are otherwise unadorned. In July, I started with three buried near Corrie. My co‐workers gave me stand up balloons and artificial flowers to place at their graves.
This means so much for the work I do in honor of Corrie, so these children are remembered.
I am grateful to my husband, John, for the wreaths and flowers to take to the children’s graves.
Both of these actions encouraged me when I visited today. I am so proud of my son, Hayes, because he asked if he could go. He did not have to. With his help, we adopted eight more babies’ graves into our care.
Six of them all in one section separate from the Angel Garden. I plan to get a Christmas tree to stick into the ground at the center. This number has brought us close to 40 children’s and babies’ graves for which we care.
Tonight, we light candles in honor of all our children.
Photos by Rebecca T. Dickinson
Corrie's Season 
I have my son’s ashes. I can’t bear to bury them somewhere until I know where I want to spend the rest of my life. I also have my husband’s ashes. If I buried them here I would never be able to leave. Someday maybe. I told my daughter that if I should die and she has all these ashes to mix them together and scatter them where she sees fit. Strange conversation for some, I wish it were strange to me. Tell Hayes he is a champion for being such a good big brother, just for remembering his sister with so much love.
Thank you so much for your honesty. I spoke with a mother who lost her daughter in October, and that I wrote about in one of my recent poems, who mentioned something similar that her ashes would be combined with her daughter’s. They’d spread them across her grandmother’s grave when the time comes.
Reblogged this on Autism Candles.